


10 Things I Hate About You

by tvfanatic97



Series: Rom-Com Tropes Galore [6]
Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, Spider-Man: Homecoming (2017)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Romantic Comedy, F/M, Fake/Pretend Relationship
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-12-21
Updated: 2018-12-21
Packaged: 2019-09-24 09:43:09
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,312
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17098223
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/tvfanatic97/pseuds/tvfanatic97
Summary: Ned Leeds is head over heels for Betty Brant, but Betty's overprotective dad will not allow Betty to date unless her older sister MJ does so Ned schemes to set MJ up with weird, withdrawn student Peter Parker.10 Things I Hate You (1999) AU.





	10 Things I Hate About You

“Okay,” Mr Mitchell said as he clapped his hands to gain the class’ attention. “What did everyone think of ‘The Great Gatsby’?” He looked across the classroom at the students, pointedly avoiding his best albeit most outspoken student’s gaze.

The teacher sighed with relief when another girl across the classroom raised her hand and spoke up, “I loved it. Even after all those years Gatsby still loved Daisy; it was such a romantic enduring kind of love,” she said with a dreamy sigh as she leant her cheek against her hands.

MJ, as the teacher expected, snorted at this to which the teacher took a deep calming breath to prepare himself for another one of her tirades.

“Romantic? Gatsby?” she asked incredulously as she turned in her chair to fully face the other girl as she addressed her. “Gatsby is the equivalent of the modern-day “nice guy” who wouldn’t respect Daisy’s decision to not be with him. There’s nothing romantic about continually pursuing someone after they’ve explicitly told you they don’t want to be with you.”

Mr Mitchell took yet another deep calming breath and closed his eyes, shooting off a quick prayer to any deity that was listening to grant him strength and everlasting patience.

“Plus-“ MJ continued after everyone had thought she was done ranting, “It’s all based on Ginerva King rejecting Fitzgerald and him convincing himself it was because he was poor and not anything to do with her just not wanting to be with him. Fitzgerald was just a horny slime bag,” she declared with finality.

“As opposed to a bitter self-righteous hag who has no friends?” Flash piped up from the back of the class. A few of his cronies laughed along with him and even high-fived him for his comment.

“That’s enough from you Flash,” Mr Mitchell chastised.

“I guess in this society being male and an asshole makes you worthy of our time,” MJ retorted to Flash. “Why can’t we have a more diverse reading list, like Toni Morrison,  James Baldwin, Aline Ohanesian, Nadia Hashimi or just any author that’s not a rich white person with a limited world view? It’s just funny how-“

MJ’s words were interrupted by Peter’s unceremonious entrance.

“What’d I miss?” he asked breathlessly. He at least had the decency to look slightly embarrassed about being fifteen minutes late to class.

“The oppressive patriarchal, white supremacist values that dictate our education,” MJ declared.

Peter only smiled awkwardly at her words and silently settled into a desk in the far back corner of the class.

“Are you on your period or something?” Flash asked tauntingly.

“Ah of course. And here we have the dumbass cis straight male who has no understanding of how the female body works never having been anywhere near one besides his mother’s when he was an infant,” MJ said rolling her eyes.

“Both of you be quiet!” Mr Mitchell interjected. “MJ go to the office, you’ve been really disruptive and plus- you’re pissing me off,” he declared motioning for her to get out of the classroom.

“What? Mr Mitchell I-“ MJ tried to defend herself.

“Later!” he said with a dismissive wave which caused MJ’s classmates to laugh.

She angrily gathered her belongings and headed to the office. Fortunately, she was dismissed with nothing more than “Work on your attitude so people don’t perceive you as a heinous bitch” from the quirky, unfiltered guidance counsellor.

 

* * *

 

 

MJ was sat thumbing through a copy of ‘Americanah’ in the armchair by the living room window engrossed in the novel when her father’s arrival interrupted her.

“Hello MJ. Make anyone cry today?” he asked as he looked through the pile of mail.

“Sadly no,” she didn’t bother looking up as she spoke. “But, it’s only 4:30,” she finally looked up to face him and they both grinned bemusedly at each other.

“Hi daddy,” Betty greeted sweetly as she leaned in to kiss their father’s cheek. Everything about her was the antithesis of MJ, from her blonde hair and blue eyes coupled with her pale white skin that matched their father’s, to her overly sweet disposition.

“Hello precious,” their father greeted with a wide grin on his face.

“And where have you been?” MJ asked Betty with eyes narrowed.

“Nowhere,” Betty said defensively.

Before MJ could press her more on her whereabouts, her father stumbled upon a letter addressed to her.

“Hey what’s this? It says Michelle Jones.”

MJ excitedly snatched the letter out of her dad’s hands and hurriedly ripped the envelope open. “I got in!” she exclaimed excitedly, jumping out of her seat. “I got in! I got in! I got in!” she continued exclaiming as she jumped up and down.

“Uh honey?” her dad tried to calm her down. “That’s great but Stanford is a bit far isn’t it?”

“That’s the basis of its appeal,” MJ stated, eyebrows raised as if to say “duh”.

“I thought we decided you’d go to NYU, nice and close to home.”

MJ finally stopped her cheering and celebrating and calmed down before turning to face her father, “No,  _you_  decided.”

“Oh so you just pick up and leave? Is that it?” her father asked disbelievingly.

“Let’s hope so!” Betty interjected excitedly.

“Ask Betty who drove her home,” MJ said with a taunting smirk.

“MJ don’t change the- wait,  _drove_? Who drove you home?” he asked sternly turning to stare Betty down.

“Don’t get upset daddy, but there’s this boy-“

“Who’s a flaming imbecile,” MJ added helpfully with a smirk.

“And I think he might ask me-“ Betty tried to explain.

“Please, please,” her father interrupted her as he placed his hands on her shoulders to reason with her. “I think I know what he’s going to ask you and I think I know the answer. The answer is  _no_. It’s always no!” He steered Betty to sit beside MJ on the couch so he could address both girls simultaneously. “What are the two-house rules? Number one: no dating till you graduate. Number two: no dating till you graduate. That’s it!” He declared with a finality to his tone that suggested there was no room for argument.

“Daddy that’s so unfair,” Betty sighed out.

“No, no. Wanna know what’s unfair? Today, I had to deliver twins to a 15-year old girl who told me she wished she’d just listened to her father.”

“She didn’t say that though,  _did she_?” Betty challenged.

“Well that’s what she would’ve said if she wasn’t so doped up,” their dad countered easily.

“Can we focus on me for a second?” Betty said gesturing to herself. “I am the only girl in school who’s not dating,” she declared dramatically.

“No you’re not, your sister is not dating.”

“And I never intend to,” MJ stated.

“Just because you’ve taken a vow to be celibate and single for the rest of your life doesn’t mean the rest of us-“ Betty started ranting.

Their father interrupted them with a clap of the hands, “Okay! New rule: Betty, you can date.” Betty started to smile at his words but the smile fell as he carried on, “when  _she_  does,” he declared pointing to MJ before walking away from the pair.

“She just said she never intends to date!” Betty protested going after their father.

“Then I guess you’ll never date too,” he said with a grin plastered on his face. “I’d like that a lot,” he added more quietly to himself. “You’ll just have to-“ his on-call pager signalling that he was needed back at the hospital went off interrupting the rest of his words.

“We’ll talk about Stanford later,” he pointed to MJ as he gathered his work bag.

“Cool, see you later pops,” MJ said already turning back to her novel.

“But daddy-“ Betty tried to reason with the man.

“Gotta go, bye!” he said as he left the house.

Once he’d left Betty turned to her older sister, staring at her annoyed. “You’re literally ruining my life.”

“I don’t know that that’s the correct use of “literally”,” MJ fired back, flicking through her novel without looking up at the annoyed younger girl.

Betty stared her down as she tried to think of a retort but eventually gave up as MJ remained unbothered and focused on her book, so she just stormed off.

 

* * *

 

 

“Uh, hi,” Betty greeted, leaning her head down to get the attention of the guy who was engrossed in a French dictionary.

He hurriedly looked up from the book and stumbled out of his seat. “Betty, hi, hi.” He pulled the chair opposite his out for her to take a seat then sat back down. “I’m Ned, by the way,” he stuttered out.

She regarded him bemusedly at how nervous he was, “Thanks for agreeing to tutor me.”

“Yeah, yeah. No problem. No problem at all,” he continued stuttering nervously, barely able to maintain eye contact with the girl opposite him.

After a moment’s pause, he spoke up again this time a bit more composed but his nervous energy ever present. “Well, uh, I thought we could start with pronunciation.” He finally looked up to meet her eyes, “If that’s alright with you?”

“Not the hacking and gagging and spitting part, please,” Betty said with a slight shudder.

“Well-“ Ned started quietly, his gaze shifting away from hers again. “There is an alternative.”

“There is?” she questioned, hope filled.

“Yeah, French food. We could, uh, eat some together say…Saturday night?” he asked nervously, his voice cracking slightly.

“You’re asking me out?” Betty was surprised by this turn of events to say the least. “That’s so cute! What’s your name again?” her tone was slightly patronising.

“Ned. Listen- I know that your dad doesn’t let you date but I thought that if it was for French class that-“

Betty interrupted the rest of his sentence, “Wait a minute. Ed-“

“ _Ned_ ” he corrected.

“My dad just came up with a new rule. I can date when my sister does.” Betty carried on without acknowledging that she’d messed up his name.

Ned perked up at hearing this. “Wait, you’re kidding! Let me ask you, do you like Star Wars because-“

Once again Betty interrupted him, “Beacoup problemo Ted, in case you haven’t heard, my sister is a 50-year old spinster in the body of an 18-year old.”

“Oh well, I don’t know about that but I mean, I guess she is a little antisocial,” Ned tried to reason without being rude.

“If by “antisocial” you mean a bitch, sure!”

Ned ignored the rude comment, “I’m sure lots of guys here would want to go out with her.”

“You think you could find someone who’d date MJ?” Betty scoffed.

“Yeah sure, why not?”

“You’d do that for me?” Betty asked sweetly as she rubbed Ned’s arm.

“Hell yes!” Ned exclaimed loudly before he caught himself. He cleared his throat and tried again, “I mean- y’know, I could look into it.”

“Aw thanks Ned,” she said in an overly sweet tone before she left him to ponder how he was going to get this done.

He sat there for a few minutes trying to think about who could potentially date MJ when he decided to enlist the help of his friend Abe. He fired off a text for him to meet him asap then got up to leave the library to go to the agreed upon rendezvous point.

He waited for some time before Abe came round the corner, “You want me to help you do what?” Abe asked without so much as a greeting.

“Find someone to date MJ,” Ned responded with a slight wince.

“MJ as in Michelle Jones, moody senior and adopted sister to one Betty Brant?”

Ned nodded tentatively with a grimace on his face.

Abe only burst out laughing in response. Ned stood there simply watching as Abe was hunched over wheezing in laughter for what felt like hours.

Eventually Abe’s laughter died down and he stood up straight. “I think I might have a guy actually,” he said already walking ahead of Ned thereby leaving him to jog after him before Ned could even find out what guy he has in mind.

 

* * *

 

 

“ _Peter Parker_?” Ned asked incredulously in response to his friend’s words.

“Yep,” Abe declared simply as he dug into his lunch.

Ned leaned forward in his seat, his own lunch forgotten. “What makes you think he’ll date MJ?”

“I don’t know he’s real weird. Disappeared for ages, came back all weird and he's always acting weird. He’s just weird,” Abe shrugged.

“Yeah you’ve already said he’s weird like five times. I still don’t see how that means he’ll date MJ…”

“I just figured he’s weird, she’s weird. They could work,” he declared with a shrug like it was that simple.

“That’s not enough to determine if two people will date!”

“Do you wanna date Betty or not? It’s not like you have many options.”

Ned huffed, watching the guy in question who was sat across the cafeteria as he considered his options or lack thereof for a moment. “Well what do you know about him? Other than that he’s “weird”?”

“Not much,” Abe said between bites of his fries. “He disappeared for like a year last year then just came back. No one really knows anything about him but that whole mysterious element could work in your favour. Girls love guys that are all dark and mysterious.”

Ned continued to watch him with interest for a while before he turned back to Abe having made up his mind. “How would we get him to date MJ then?”

“Could pay him?” Abe suggested.

“Neither of us have the money for that, Abe.”

“Woah, woah, who said anything about  _us_? I have no stakes in this,” Abe rolled his eyes as he spoke.

“Okay, fine. Either way I can’t pay him so that idea’s out,” Ned sighed out defeatedly as he tried to think of other possible ways of getting Peter to date MJ.

Abe didn’t say anything for a moment, his eyes directed at the ceiling as he was deep in thought until his attention snapped back to Ned with a bright idea. “We just need a backer!” he exclaimed victoriously.

“A  _what_?” Ned questioned staring blankly at Ned in confusion.

“Someone who has the money that you don’t have but lacks the brains that you do have,” he explained slowly.

The pair eyed each other knowingly with matching smirks as the same person sprang to both of their minds then they simultaneously turned to watch the figure sat a few tables down from them.

“Flash Thompson,” they declared at the same time as they got out of their seats to go to the idiot in question.

Flash was sat scrolling through some model’s Instagram with his friends as they made degrading comments about her, completely ignoring Abe who’d sat opposite him and Ned who stood beside their lunch table, hovering awkwardly.

Eventually Flash looked up from his phone and eyed the pair with distaste, “What are you doing here?”

Abe cleared his throat as he prepared to proposition him, “We came here in hopes that we could talk to you about something that could potentially be of interest to you.” Ned eyed him with distaste at his overly formal tone; he sounded like he was conducting a business deal and he didn’t like the thought of Betty being treated as such.

“Not interested,” Flash declared as he turned back to his phone.

“Wait- wait, just hear me out. I know you’re interested in Betty Brant but you can’t go out with her unless her sister is dating someone so-” Abe paused and sat up before presenting his grand idea to Flash who watched on only mildly interested in what he had to say. “So, what if you were to hire someone to go out with her- someone, who’s just as weird as she is like…” he said turning towards where Peter Parker was sat by himself listening to music through his headphones.

“Like Peter Parker?” Flash asked sceptically.

“Yeah, I mean think about it. It could work and you’d get Betty if it did,” Abe said with open arms and raised eyebrows as he attempted to reason with the bully.

Flash scrutinised Abe, “What’s in it for you?”

“How about  _we_ -“ Abe said gesturing to himself and Ned who was still awkwardly stood at the end of the table. “We start getting invited to all your notorious parties once in a while?”

He considered the pair intently for a few quiet, nerve-wracking moments before he made his decision, “Okay so you guys get to not be losers and I get the girl. I’ll think about it,” his tone was dismissive as he turned back to his friends.

 

* * *

 

 

Peter was jogging around the track away from the rest of the group, music blaring from his headphones when Flash started jogging alongside him.

Peter just ignored him and carried on jogging but he matched his pace and didn’t leave his side until Peter eventually slid his headphones off to find out what he wanted.

“Hey Penis Parker,” Flash greeted once he’d got the other boy’s attention finally.

“We’re not in middle school, don’t call me that.”

“Ha ha, middle school. Those where the days huh?”

“What do you want, Flash?” Peter asked dismissively, lacking patience for Flash’s attempt at small talk.

Flash exhaled as he gave up on trying to not directly talk about MJ. “You see that girl over there?” He pointed towards MJ who was sat on the ground reading a book whilst everyone else was running.

Peter’s pace slowed to a stop so he could take a better look at the figure he was pointing to. “Yeah.”

“That’s Michelle Jones, or MJ, I want you to go out with her,” Flash stated.

Peter snorted before he could help himself, “Whatever you say Flash.”

“Look I can’t take out her sister Betty until she starts dating.”

Peter stared back at Flash, his expression unwavering, “Okay, so?”

“So I need you to go out with MJ so I can go out with Betty,” Flash clarified.

Peter let out a humourless laugh then resumed his jogging but Flash followed along with him.

“Look I’m willing to pay you to go out with her okay!”

Peter stopped running and turned to face Flash, “That’s pretty tasteless, even for you Flash.”

“Look I know with Ben and everything you and May probably need the mon-“

Flash swallowed the rest of his words down as Peter took an imposing step towards him which brought him right in his face, “What do you know about what May and I need, huh?”

“Ben worked for my dad’s company so I know about everything that happened even though you didn’t tell anyone. Look man, I’ll compensate you generously for this. Please, Peter?”

Peter regarded him for a quick second before he spoke, “200 bucks,” he said with a slight smirk knowing full well that was not a reasonable amount for a single date. He eyed Flash impatiently, daring him to argue with the amount.

“Sure, done.” Flash huffed after a while then took out his wallet to hand him $50 bills.

Peter smiled jeeringly after Flash as he walked away before he turned back to watch MJ who carried on reading unaware as he considered whether to actually go through with this or just keep Flash’s money and rip the asshole off.

From the bleachers, Ned and Abe sat watching Peter in turn.

“Okay, so how do we make sure he actually sees this through and takes MJ out?” Ned asked nervously.

“We could maybe give him a helping hand?” Abe suggested, voice rising an octave at the prospect of having to both speak to the strange Peter Parker and give him advice on the even stranger MJ.

 

 

* * *

 

Days passed as Ned and Abe tried to gather the courage to approach Peter until they eventually mustered up the courage to go and speak to him in the cafeteria.

Still, they stood a slight distance away muttering to themselves to try and get each other to go up to him first until Peter looked up and eyed them curiously at their bizarre behaviour, effectively forcing Ned to approach him.

“He-hey, Peter right?” Ned stuttered out nervously.

“What’s up dude,” Peter said in a friendly tone that didn’t match Ned’s perception of the older boy given what Abe had told him.

“We were wondering if we could talk to you about, uh, Michelle Jones,” Ned spoke quietly still nervous at having to do this.

“What about her?”

At this point Abe stepped in to help his friend out, “We know you’re trying to take her out and we could help.”

Peter’s eyes swung between the pair with interest, “How do you know I’m trying to do anything with MJ?”

“Uh…” Ned’s eyes nervously flew to meet Abe’s as the pair scrambled for an explanation. Eventually Ned decided to just be straight with Peter, “I like Betty and needed someone to go out with her sister so Abe came up with the plan-“ Abe narrowed his eyes as if he’d been betrayed by Ned at this “-to get Flash to pay someone to date MJ.”

Peter didn’t say anything for a moment and just eyed the pair.

“We know it’s kinda shitty but I really like Betty,” Ned tried to defend.

There was something in the earnestness and innocence of Ned that made Peter sympathetic for the other guy so he decided to hear them out. “Okay, tell me about Michelle then.”

“Well so, I’ve been giving Betty French tutoring and she told me a bunch of facts about MJ that could be of use,” Ned said excitedly as he took the seat opposite Peter.

 

* * *

 

 

Armed with the all the information Ned and Abe had given him (they’d even put all the information into an “MJ” binder for his convenience), Peter found himself at an art exhibition at some loft in the city he’d been informed MJ would be attending.

Peter walked around casually, trying to fit in and pretend like he knew anything about art when he eventually spotted MJ. Trying to act as casual as possible, he approached her where she was stood in front of a particular piece.

“Great cause, huh?” Peter said to her without turning to face her.

MJ either didn’t hear him or chose to ignore him as she carried on analysing the art piece with intent.

“So are you involved with the organisation or are you just into the art?”

MJ finally turned to him with a look of disgust, “I’m here to support a great cause and look at great art, not to be bothered by assholes so fuck off.” She paused, her eyes widening slightly in recognition, but she quickly recovered and walked away from Peter to go onto the next piece.

Peter walked after her, “Michelle, right? I’m Peter, I go to Midto-“

“I don’t care that we go to the same school, I told you to fuck off.”

“I’m sorry, I’m not trying to come onto you or anything. I’m just interested in finding out more about the organisation and the exhibition and I just got excited to see a familiar face, sorry to bother you,” Peter said with a small smile before he turned to walk away from her.

“The organisation promotes the arts in inner city schools,” MJ explained stopping Peter in his tracks. Peter turned back to join her before she continued, “This exhibition is all the kids’ artwork that people can buy and the money goes back to the schools. I volunteer with them teaching art classes.”

“That’s- that’s amazing,” Peter said genuinely amazed.

“How are you even here when you don’t know anything about all this?”

Peter panicked as he tried to think of an explanation that wouldn’t make him seem creepy, “Uh, I was just walking around and saw the signs.”

MJ looked at him like she saw right through his flimsy excuse but she didn’t comment on his obvious lie as she simply turned and continued walking around the loft.

Peter followed after her, “Is it okay if I follow you round and you tell me more about the works? If not that’s fine, I’ll fuck off like you told me to.”

MJ eyed him, considering him for a moment, “Fine, but no stupid questions.”

Peter followed after her obediently, listening with keen interest as she told him the story behind each piece and the kid who’d painted/drawn it until eventually they’d seen every single piece in the exhibition.

He made use of the $200 Flash had given him to buy a piece. As the piece was being packaged for him by one of the organisers he turned to MJ, “So, how much longer will you be here?”

“I’m leaving soon actually, I just dropped by to see some of the kids and their pieces.”

“Do you wanna grab or coffee or something?”

MJ sighed disappointedly, “Do you think just because you came to this exhibition and spent 200 bucks on a piece that means I have to go out with you?”

“What, no-“ Peter tried to explain.

“You’re a piece of shit,” MJ said with finality then she turned and walked away from him.

 

* * *

 

 

After the enjoyable-  _minus that one asshole Peter from her school_ \- exhibition, MJ spent the day walking around some of the markets and a book fair she’d stumbled upon then got home a little after sunset.

She was making her way downstairs to grab some leftovers from the fridge when her father stopped her in her tracks, “Do you know anything about a party?”

She shook her head no and turned to carry on to the kitchen but stopped when Betty spoke up, “People expect me to be at this party.”

“If MJ’s not going, you’re not going,” their father stated.

“Why can’t you be normal?” Betty stepped up to MJ.

“Normal means different things for different people, Betty,” MJ retorted with a slight patronising hilt to her voice.

Betty groaned at this, “Everyone is gonna be at that party!”

“Not me, and apparently-  _not you_ ,” MJ said teasingly.

“MJ-“ Betty grabbed the older girls arm and dragged her to the side. “I get that you’re not interested in all the things I am but please could you just come to this party tonight so I can at least do something that I enjoy for one night.”

“Parties are lame.”

“They might be to you, but isn’t your whole feminism thing about allowing women to be shamelessly themselves and like things they like without being mocked? Because going to this party and indulging in all those lame things is what I like.”

MJ sighed in defeat. Betty had used her belief system against her in a way where she couldn’t retort without looking like a hypocrite. She may have been impressed if this didn’t get in the way of her Saturday night plans to stay in with a good Netflix documentary and junk food.

“Fine, I’ll make an appearance,” she eventually conceded.

Betty and her friend squealed in delight and both came to wrap their arms around her in excitedly in a group hug.

“I don’t like this,” their father protested from across the hall.

“It’s just a party daddy.”

“I’ll be there, it’ll be fine,” MJ reassured her father. “C’mon kiddos, let’s go,” MJ gestured to Betty and her friend.

“You’re not going in that are you?” Betty asked eyeing MJ’s outfit, black skinny jeans and a t-shirt with a young Angela Davis on it.

“No of course not, I need to put on shoes first.”

Betty huffed realising it was futile trying to talk about fashion or style with MJ so she instead linked arms with her friend then the two walked ahead to leave the house and wait by MJ’s car.

MJ put on a pair of old battered converse and grabbed her phone and car and house keys then joined the girls to drive them to Flash’s house.

As soon as they arrived at the party, Betty and her friend had immediately separated from MJ and went their own way, leaving MJ to wander around the party alone.

“Michelle, hi!” Peter greeted excitedly when he saw her.

MJ rolled her eyes at the sight of him and carried on walking past him.

“Michelle- wait, I just wanna apologise,” Peter rushed after her. “I only stayed at the exhibition and bought a piece because it was a good cause not to make a move or whatever.”

“Great, you can find out more about the organisation on their website if you want more info,” MJ said with a fake sweet voice before she turned away from him and walked through the party.

 

* * *

 

 

When Peter found her again she was pouring herself a drink, adding way too much vodka to her vodka lime soda so Peter put a hand out to take the vodka bottle away from her.

“Woah, what are you doing Michelle?”

“Getting drunk and having fun,” MJ snatched the bottle back from him and added more vodka to her cup.

“Well you can do what you want.”

“Wow, thanks so much. I’m glad I have a man’s permission,” MJ said sarcastically before turning to walk away from him for the umpteenth time tonight.

Peter wandered around the party for a bit longer contemplating leaving but he found he couldn’t do it, too worried about MJ after seeing how much she was drinking so he walked around some more to find her again.

When he found her she was pouring yet another spirit into a cup which worried Peter because she was pouring way too much of it, and she was now mixing liquor which wouldn’t turn out well.

“Hey, hey, why don’t you let me have this one?” Peter asked, desperately trying to get the drink away from her.

“No,” MJ whined with a pout before walking away from him yet again.

This time Peter immediately followed after her, not wanting to lose her in the heaps of people again.

“Queen Bey!” MJ shouted out, downing the rest of her drink and handing off the empty cup to Peter before she got up on the dining table to dance to the song currently playing.

Peter watched on as MJ lip synced the song lyrics and danced, a crowd slowly gathering around her to watch who were ironically enough, going apeshit for MJ’s dancing like the song title. The group watching her was starting to grow larger, with leering gazes directed towards MJ who continued dancing like no one was watching before she bumped her head on the chandelier and started falling off the table.

Peter rushed to catch her in his arms, “Are you okay?”

“I’m fine,” she slurred out, barely able to stand without Peter’s support.

“Sure, c’mon,” Peter directed her out of the house, keeping two hands wrapped firmly around her waist as he walked slowly behind her stumbling form.

On their way out they bumped into a moping Ned, but he immediately got up and came over to help Peter with MJ.

“Hey-uh, can we talk?” Ned asked over MJ, who was slumped on Peter.

“Now’s not the best time bud,” Peter pointed his head towards MJ.

“I’ll just be a minute, please.”

Peter once again found himself disarmed by the other boy’s sweet, well-meaning nature. “Fine, help me put her in that chair.”

Once they gently guided MJ into the chair they moved a few steps away to talk, though Peter ensured MJ was still in his eyeline.

“The whole thing with MJ and Betty is off.”

Peter only looked at him questioningly so Ned continued on, “She never wanted me, she wanted Flash the whole time,” Ned said sadly.

“Ned if you like Betty so much and if she’s worth all this trouble you’ve gone to then you have to see it through. You’re twice the man that Flash is so you have to give it a chance then if Betty says no to you, you move on. Okay?”

Ned seemed to perk up slightly at the pep talk, “Yeah, you’re right.”

Peter clapped his shoulder, “Okay, I’ve gotta help MJ.” With that he went to grab MJ from the chair, with Ned’s help, to get her outside for some fresh air.

With a lot of stumbling and near-falls they finally got to the front of Flash’s house and settled on the freshly cut front lawn.

“So you tried to buy a date from me earlier, now you’re taking advantage of my drunken state? From one slimy tactic to the next,” MJ mumbled from where she was slumped opposite him.

“I’m not- that’s  _not_  what I’m doing. I just wanted to help you since you might have a concussion but I can call one of your friends or someone you’d be more comfortable having help you if you want.”

MJ watched him or attempted to watch him- in her drunken state she couldn’t focus on him as her body kept swaying involuntarily and she could barely keep her eyes open. “Fine, you can stay.”

“I grabbed your phone by the way, here,” he handed over said phone to her so she could slip it into her pocket where it’d fallen out before, for her peace of mind.

“I just wanna lie down and forget about that asshole Flash with my sister,” MJ whined as her body continued swaying, unable to sit up properly.

Peter moved to sit by her side, moving slowly to give her time to protest if she wasn’t comfortable and when she didn’t protest he settled by her side to allow her to rest her head on his shoulder.

“Flash is an asshole,” Peter agreed.

“What’s- what’s Flash ever done-“ MJ mumbled before going quiet as she slumped further into him.

He shook her, trying to be forceful enough to wake her but not too rough as to cause her to feel nauseous given how drunk she was. “MJ! MJ wake up!”

She woke up and leaned up to study his face. “The little floof thing of your eyebrow is cute,” she said with a giggle, reaching a hand up to brush a finger across the eyebrow in question.

Peter laughed at her intoxicated state and MJ retracted her hand but maintained their eye contact, the air so charged that despite not having had a sip of alcohol Peter felt his head spin and he was intoxicated by her. The moment was broken however when MJ suddenly leaned over to vomit, barely giving him enough time to scoot away from her.

Once she was done vomiting he helped her up and took her to sit by the porch whilst he went inside to grab her a bottle of water.

He took her to her car, with her protesting the whole way about how he was patronising her. She carried on protesting as he helped her into the passenger seat and buckled her seat-belt for her before he went over to the driver’s side.

They then rode in silence for a while with the windows open slightly to allow MJ to get some fresh air and sober up some more.

They pulled up in front of her house and Peter broke the silence once he’d parked the car, “You don’t seem like the type to let someone like Flash get under your skin.”

“You don’t know me,” MJ retorted.

“But I’m trying to get to know you.”

“The only thing people know about me is that I’m  _scary_. I don’t even wanna go into the implications of people thinking an opinionated black woman is aggressive or somehow scary,” MJ rolled her eyes.

“Yeah well- I like that you’re so opinionated,” Peter declared simply before he could stop himself.

They watched each other for a silent moment before Peter carried on, ”It’s what made me ask you out earlier. You were talking so passionately about the unequal distribution of resources between schools in the city and why work like that of the organisation you volunteer for is so important and I was in awe of you. That’s why I asked you out, not because I thought I’d earnt a date by buying something,” Peter mumbled.

“Most people, my dad included, don’t like how opinionated I am. I think sometimes my dad would rather I was more like his Betty,” MJ admitted quietly, the last bit of alcohol still in her system spurring her to open up. “I’m an outsider at school and to my family.”

Peter moved a hand to MJ’s chin to bring her face up from where she was looking down at her lap, “I highly doubt that. There’s no way that your dad would want you to be like Betty- I mean I’m sure she’s great and all, but you’re  _you_  and people are drawn to and appreciate you for who you are,” Peter cleared his throat nervously before finishing, “I’m sure your dad loves you both equally.”

MJ smiled at his words and just looked at him, pleasantly surprised at the sincerity with which he spoke.

Before she could talk herself out of it she leaned in to kiss him and Peter seemed to lean forward slightly to meet her lips, but at the last second he turned away from her. Snubbing her.

“Uh, so I’ll leave your car and head off home,” Peter mumbled, nervously tapping the steering wheel.

MJ pulled back to watch him, the hurt on her face clear. “Put my keys through the letterbox,” she said quietly as she rushed out of the car and walked into her house without turning back, leaving Peter to run his hands through his hair a few times nervously as he thought about everything that had happened tonight.

**Author's Note:**

> Once again the people of twitter bullied me into posting this so...happy holidays I guess. Just a quick note to say whilst the film is one of my fave rom-coms of all time, it's very much a product of the late 90s, as is the main character Kat's feminism if we're being honest so I've updated some things to make it fit better with a character in 2018 lol hope y'all don't mind me bastardising a classic film like this :/. Hope you enjoy it and as always, comments and kudos are very encouraging and much appreciated!
> 
> Also you can find me @tvfanatic97-2 on tumblr and @dayaspsychic on twitter x


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